Stephany
Brier, WA (just north of Seattle)
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Joined: 12/03/2002
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Oh gee, transitioning from a longtime home to a retirement complex is hard for everyone. When my fil moved from the house he built 50 years prior, it was extremely hard. We tried to keep him focused on how much less lonely it would be and all the activities and field trips he could enjoy. He still had his drivers license when he first moved, so that made it a little easier, but he lost it after the first month he was there because of his vision.
A few little suggestions to help the transition:
- try to find a "buddy" or new friend at the complex before she moves in. Can she spend a day or 2 there before she moves in?
- be sure to move the things that uniquely made her house home. For my fil, it was a grandmother clock, a few end tables, and lamps that he built, and his bedroom set. We also hung pictures in similar groupings as were in his house. And we put all the do dads from around his old kitchen and sink into his new kitchen, even the same things on the fridge. We had to find some new furniture to fit the space, but having the familiar stuff really helped.
- he only moved 3 miles from his old house, but once he was out, he didn't want to go back. I think it was too painful. But stories about the new owner and their love of their new house seemed to help. We also let him know how the house was looking/doing each time we drove by it without him.
- Last, when my grandmother had to move to assisted living, she absolutely did not want to move, but she had to for health reasons. So my aunt made a deal with her to move for 3 months and then if she was well enough and still did not like it at the assisted living, then she could move back to her house. At the end of the 3 months, she chose to stay at the assisted living and to sell her house. I think having control over the situation really helped with her transition.
- And for you, don't be in such a hurry to get rid of everything. Take time to sort through and if you are at all doubtful about getting rid of something, keep it for 6 months then see how you feel. My husband regrets some of the things they got rid of now, even 5 years later.
Hope these comments help,
Stephany
Stephany & Wally Schneider + 2 grown kids, a ball-obsessed beagle, and a camping cat
2004 Sunnybrook 2850SL
2002 GMC 2500HD Duramax crew cab short bed
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Wanderlost
Texas Hill Country
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Joined: 10/29/2004
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Mom and I are back at her house. Over the last two days, we've managed to pack two whole boxes of photos. It's very hard to do, since we both get distracted looking at them. But I do believe the total number of photo boxes will be much smaller than I originally thought.
When we retired and came home to Texas, one of our four PODS was filled with nothing but books, LPs, DVDs, CDs, cassettes, and office paperwork. Starting to pack up files here told me where I got my tendency to hold onto such things... Mom's genealogy records will be in much larger quantity than the photos.
She's decided on what cookware to take, which glasses to take, and some of the artwork she'll hang there. Since the cookware is not presently in use, I can pack that up. Now if I could just get here to start going through her clothes...
Meanwhile, back in the Hill Country, L'Andante goes in for an interior update just as soon as WLToo can schedule it. Then it will only take two weeks to be finished. I'm really looking forward to using L'Andante again -- that trailer really was a failed experiment. Very nice trailer, but just not our thing. Not to mention Spotacus truly loves L'Andante and is the perfect traveling cat in her.
One very good thing has come out of Mom's accident: my first cousin (who's 10 years younger than Mom) decided to stop driving. Mom's accident scared her right into selling her car and letting her daughter and SIL do all the driving, which they are happy to do. So she should be safely around a while longer...
My first cousins range 42 years between oldest and youngest, and there were 36 of them.
Time to take more photos.
Later, y'all.
"The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated." -- Mahatma Gandhi
Czarny, black cat
Rainbow Bridge: Spotacus, Alexander the Grrreat, and so very many more
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Wanderlost
Texas Hill Country
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Joined: 10/29/2004
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Looks like two of the siblings will be showing up to pick up their stuff and do a little helping. 'Bout time...
Mom's got me searching online to find her clubs' and associations' counterparts in the retirement location. She was an officer in all of them here, but just wants to be a general member in the new location, so I'm not supposed to say anything about her having been an officer. Shhhh.....
The first estate sale company contacted me today. Not in a big hurry for them to start looking over the stuff, since Mom hasn't fully decided what all to take, and the relatives haven't yet gotten all the stuff they want to pick up (and pick up is the operative word - unless they pay for all shipping and handling, it's pick up or don't get it). They have until July; after that, it goes into the sale for Mom's maintenance.
Meanwhile, this morning a grackle landed on the driveway. Thing was almost the size of a crow. Wow.
Whoa, it's suppertime already. Later, y'all.
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magnusfide
On the Road Again and Again and Again...
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Joined: 10/30/2009
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I'm glad the sibs are helping at least some. Be careful about those sale companies. I've heard good and bad experiences with them. Some charge high commissions and you end up with less than from a yard sale. Negotiating the commission is a good idea I hear.
"The only time you should fear cast iron is if your wife is fixin' to hit you with it."-Kent Rollins
First law of science: don't spit into the wind.
Magnus
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Wanderlost
Texas Hill Country
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Joined: 10/29/2004
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Have six boxes full of photos and papers. By tomorrow, I expect to have emptied one closet, which is supposed to be most of the photos. But instead of going to the next bedroom closet, which has a mish mash of stuff in it, I'm going into the office closet, where more photos are supposed to be. Really want to get the photos packed first.
WLToo said Leoghaire had her fawn. He saw them together at the corn feeder. Her fawn isn't as bold as Leoghaire was at that age.
The only wildlife I've seen here lately has been spiders. I just pick 'em up and let 'em go outside.
Had a lovely rain today, right at 1/2 inch. Made Mom's antique roses real happy. Also dropped the temperature into the 50s, so I'm a little chilly at the moment. Time to go find a pair of pants.
Later, y'all.
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CA POPPY
Santa Clarita, CA, USA
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Joined: 07/07/2003
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Very good! My folks used to quote an old adage: "If you wish to live and thrive, let a spider go alive." Such mercy did not extend to black widows, however.
Judy & Bud (Judy usually the one talking here)
Darcy the Min Pin
2004 Pleasure-Way Excel TD
California poppies in the background
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Wanderlost
Texas Hill Country
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Joined: 10/29/2004
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Yeah, Judy, black widows and brown recluse spiders don't get the tender treatment. They get the flip flop o'doom...
Gonna have a new critter to observe next week. Nephew is coming up and bringing his dog. Ruger's a fairly laid back dog, but this will be her first trip without her running buddy, who is too attached to Sister to travel without her. That's going to be interesting, when Nephew finally moves out and has to take both his dogs with him. He dropped off Yoda on Sister just before he headed to Afghanistan the second time, and Yoda thinks Sister is his person. Sister doesn't want him in her house when Nephew moves out. She's downsizing in both house and critter collection, so she's finally given both sons an ultimatum: if they drag home another critter, she'll immediately take it to the local rescue (NOT the local kill shelter). 'Bout time she stood up for herself...
Finished packing up all the loose photos. Today we started on the genealogy records. Promptly ran out of boxes. So Mom sorted records by family while I went for more boxes. I don't *think* she has 25 boxes of records, but we've only just started. Could be more by the time I find where all they got stashed.
WLToo said Spotacus threw up his breakfast, went outside and ate grass, then threw that up. So he was watching Spotacus today. It's a little concerning, since Spotacus doesn't normally throw up. If he's not over it by tomorrow morning, WLToo will take him to the vet. Otherwise, Spotacus has gotten postitively chatty lately, and insists on quality kitty time several times a day. Wish I was there to enjoy that. Nothing like kitty fur to sooth a wrinkled brow...
Beautiful sunset out there. I'm going out to enjoy it.
Later, y'all.
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Wanderlost
Texas Hill Country
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Joined: 10/29/2004
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Yep, she's got 25 boxes of genealogy records. But now she's going through and tossing some of the duplicates, so there shouldn't be too many more boxes. Meanwhile, I packed up some of the cookware and utensils she wants that we don't need to use right now. Will pack up her stereo and CDs tomorrow, so we'll have room to put all the stuff she's not taking, that we pulled out of boxes stashed all over the place.
Ruger was a very well-behaved puppy, as long as Nephew was in the room or she knew he was gone somewhere. If he was outside and she was inside, she barked and howled for the first several days. The last few days, she just whined. She also decided I was an acceptable person, but Brother the Veterinarian was someone to be wary of--at least until she wanted to play, and then he was her first choice.
WLToo sent me a photo of a skinny older looking fox eating a bird right beside our porch at dawn. Said it was limping on its right forepaw. Spotacus showed no interest in the fox, but WLToo will keep an eye out for the fox and shoo Spotacus back inside if it shows up again.
All worn out for some reason, so it's bedtime. Later, y'all.
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Wanderlost
Texas Hill Country
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Joined: 10/29/2004
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Doing the happy dance. Mom's apartment is ready. We'll dash home on Friday, she'll sign for the apartment on Saturday. Then we'll take final measurements, locate all the outlets, etc., then come back to her place to finish packing.
Nephew is coming up next week to stay until the move happens. He'll be staining/sealing the deck, organizing the barn stuff, and helping get the high up stuff down to short people levels, so we can decide what to do with it. Two siblings, maybe the third, are coming in July to finish packing and load.
I get to visit WLToo and Spotacus this weekend!!! And my swimming pool...
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magnusfide
On the Road Again and Again and Again...
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Joined: 10/30/2009
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Blessed news!!!![[emoticon]](http://www.coastresorts.com/sharedcontent/cfb/images/cool.gif "cool")
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